If you’re like a lot of divorced dads, you work triple time to maintain your world. Especially if your kids are a regular part of it and you’re now the soul bread winner in what used to be a two income household. It can be a
lot to keep up with and the pace can wear down even the most determined individual.
In the midst of what can become complete and udder chaos when you’re learning to juggle life as a single parent; every once in a while I think it’s important to just blow everything off and spend a day (or two) focused 130% on your kid(s).
While they understand that your life is crazy busy, they still need to feel like they’re one of, if not THE most important thing in your life. The last thing they need is to feel “in the way” or “just another thing you have to deal with.” And that happens quite quickly if you’re not careful, especially when you’re short with them while trying to meet a deadline or two.
The other powerful aspect of taking time to recharge is that it reminds you yourself of what’s really important. It’s so easy to get caught up in the minutia of a job or particular concern you have that sometimes you just need to take a step back to regain a proper perspective. When you’re focused too intently on one aspect of your life it can easily appear much larger than it actually is. Taking a step back reminds you that, in most cases it’s just one small part of the big picture.
You will find a sudden sense of liberation from releasing yourself of the responsibilities you’ve pushed yourself to maintain for so long. That one moment of recognizing you’re not late and won’t have to worry about traffic, deadlines, meetings etc. is like releasing the steam from a pressure cooker that’s about to explode.
Giving yourself a time out every once in a while, especially when you’re feeling an excessive amount of stress and anxiety, reminds you that the world won’t end if you’re not in the game for a play or two. If need be, delegate. Let someone else field the call. It’s also an opportunity to reassure the kids that when push comes to shove, your relationship with them is really all that matters. And by the way, NEVER feel guilty for making your kid the priority once in a while.
And even when you’re not taking that day off to be with them, remind them as often as you can how much you love it when they’re with you. Even if they blow it off, believe me they hear it and it means more than you’ll ever know.