One thing I have to look forward to each week is taking my oldest daughter to horseback riding on Saturday mornings. Not only does she love the time withe the horses, but it has become a guaranteed one on one time with Dad for her. I know this because she gets upset sometimes when her brother and sister join in. To her they’re infringing on that time that’s traditionally been just the two of us.
For me personally, it’s also nice to get away from all of the stress points in my life. Just being out on the farm is liberating and somewhat of an escape from the constant pressures that can build up trying to adjust to the new level of responsibilities that come with being a single dad.
It’s amazing to see what a difference making that time does for them as well. Even just making an effort to meet them for lunch at school has a huge impact. For them to see that you’re still there for them despite the changes has value you can’t even imagine.
If there is a positive to be found here it’s that you have a unique opportunity to build a very special bond with your kids. One that will get you through some of the toughest of days.
One of the positives that comes from working with your ex as opposed to against is that you’re more likely to have more of these opportunities as you both recognize the value of each spouse’s relationship with the kids. As difficult as it can be, they really need to see you working together rather than against.