RSS

Tag Archives: cleaning

Go TEAM!

So, we’re going to try a new system in our household.

In an effort to teach the kids the value of teamwork, we’re going to start having projects / chores that are completed as a team. Dishes, cleaning, raking leaves, washing the dog, anything that requires the efforts of all three working together. The effort / outcome will then be graded on an A-F scale with A equalling five points, B equalling four, all the way down to F which will garner one point. Points will then be added over time with
different events having specific point values. For example; bowling will equal 50 points, going to the movies will cost 100 points, a trip to Kings Island 500 points etc.

They’ll have the opportunity to win as a team or fail as a team and hopefully recognize that selfishness, arguing and working against each other will still require the job getting done, but not earn them any points.

In the past when two of them have argued or fought, the answer was to separate them. I’ve started sticking them in a room together for an hour (ala “The Parent Trap) to start clarifying my expectation that they’re going to have to work it out together. They’re going to be siblings the rest of their lives, time to start learning to lean on each other rather than constantly argue. Same holds true for chores. Doing the dishes, cleaning the house, helping with laundry; all of it is an opportunity for them to learn how to divvy up tasks and figure out how to achieve as a team rather than compete against each other.

First round was a little rough, but I think over time they’ll figure it out.

Have you tried something similar? Would love to hear what worked and what didn’t.

Stay tuned for updates from time to time.

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Spring Mental Cleaning

How do you do it? I’m relatively new at this game having been officially divorced for only about 8 months. And I can’t help but look at people who have done this and sometimes wonder, HOW in the world do you manage to survive?

Now, I’ll admit, I’ve made some mistakes these past few months and have been thrown several curve balls that haven’t helped matters, but I can’t help but think that this wasn’t a cakewalk for anyone who’s divorced with kids. The sheer volume of additional responsibilities thrust upon you after a separation is mind blowing. I’m not complaining mind you. I’m doing my best and somehow have gotten this far. But I woke up the other day and realized that in many areas, I’ve fallen backward rather than moved forward in terms of where my life is. I’ve dug some fairly deep holes which seemed like good ideas at the time, but are now making survival all that more strenuous. Trying to be all things to all people has caught up with me a bit and I’m finding myself desperately trying to regroup.

And what brings me peace? Of all things it’s cleaning the house. If I can have the house in order I feel like my foundation is set and I can build from there. If the house is in disarray … then I feel completely disheveled, lost, frustrated and overwhelmed. Maybe it’s because in my head then I feel like I’m falling behind in all aspects of my life. But as soon as I fold and put away a load of laundry, make the beds, put things away, clean the floors and get rid of clutter, suddenly I feel ready to tackle another one of life’s challenges.

I’m sure my ex-wife would fall over hearing that. But it’s true and I think on some level I have a new appreciation for some of her tirades about picking up after ourselves or putting things away when we were done with them. I mean, I got it before, but now I understand more of the root of those emotions. It’s not just about having an orderly house, it’s about having an orderly life. Something I wish I’d recognized in my 20′s.

And to those of you who have managed to survive to this point. I tip my hat. No one can fully appreciate what this is like, nor can anyone entering into this have any sort of knowledge of what’s coming. I just hope and pray there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Because I won’t lie. There are day’s I’m not so sure.

Well, my desktop is currently full of crap and it’s driving me crazy. So if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to wrap up this entry and start purging.

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Parental Dilemma #1

This will be the first in a series of posts focused on parental dilemmas that I encounter from time to time. In each instance the behavior of my kids will have both a negative overtone and a positive one and I’ll be trying, with your help, to determine which is the lessor of two evils.

In today’s installment, I came downstairs after family movie night to find the kids cleaning the kitchen.

Once I came to, I realized that it was well past their bed time.

So the dilemma: Reprimand them for being up past their bedtime or praise them for cleaning. Now, I knew and they knew, that their motivation was money. The eldest wanted a new e-book and had just created a chore list and a corresponding rate sheet per chore.

Regardless of the motivation, I took the stance of … “CLEANING?!!! You missed a spot!”

What would YOU do?

Follow LADD on Facebook & Twitter!

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

 
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 772 other followers

%d bloggers like this: